


Last Autumn

by nataehyung



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Car Accidents, Character Death, Drama, Drug Use, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, Medical Conditions, Minor Violence, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-04-17 17:47:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14194365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nataehyung/pseuds/nataehyung
Summary: There is something incredibly nostalgic and significant about the annual cascade of autumn leaves. As the first cherry blossom bud appeared on the thin tree, it marked the day that Hoseok's life would be altered. With the arrival of his new neighbour, a stranger with a secretive past, his once reasonably simplistic life changes. An odd male with bountiful energy moves into the apartment across from Hoseok and his roommate, and soon their lives become entwined with one another in a series of events littered with heartbreak, jealousy, betrayal and love. Numerous things happen that lead everyone to one tragic circumstance. At the end, there is a stone grave, residing beneath a cherry blossom tree. A grave in which Hoseok finds himself standing at, recounting the occurrences that led up to the sudden death that happened that bitter Autumn, when the boy arrived; when the mysterious changed everything in his life forever. Regret, desire and grief take him back to points in time when he could have prevented the loss.





	1. Arrival

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I would like to notify the readers that these are my stories from another website; asianfanfics. Unfortunately updating on this platform is difficult since the website is blocked where I live. I apologise for the inconvenience. As a result, updates for stories on this website will typically not occur on the same day and/or updates will arrive in the form of possibly more than one chapter. I hope you enjoy reading. Thank you.

> ** PRESENT DAY**
> 
>  
> 
> The cemented plot resting in front of Hoseok was decorated with pale blue and white flowers. The petals fluttered in the breeze that circled the cool area, causing the scarf he wore to waft in the wind.  
>    
>  Hoseok’s cheeks stung and his lips were as cold as ice. His fingers were sheltered from the wind inside the deep pockets of his jacket. In one hand he grasped a folded piece of paper and in the other; he tugged at the lint hidden in the corners.  
>    
>  Above his head, a cherry blossom trees branches twisted, reaching towards the sky. The grass in the corner of his eyes waved, appearing in need for a trim. He caught a glimpse of the rows of headstone, which reminded him of all the times he had curiously questioned himself as to how many of them there were.  
>    
>  “A hundred and fifty six,” he murmured to himself, a cloud hovering in front of his face like the smoke from a cigarette. He had counted them before. He had counted them over and over again, as though the number would decrease. And that he wouldn’t find himself standing at this very plot.  
>    
>  His dyed white hair gently brushed against his forehead while the long collar of his coat, flapped against his neck. The air around him was growing cooler already, despite the fact that it was the first day of autumn.  
>    
>  Slowly he bent down and reached his empty hand out of his pocket. The tips of his fingers lightly brushed against the petals of the flowers. He didn’t know who brought them down, but every time he came to visit, they were there; appearing as though they were fresh bought. He was grateful to whoever did it. He deserved it.  
>    
>  Shakily he drew in a breath and pulled out the paper and unfolded it. He started at the slightly smudged writing on the dirty paper. A strip of tape holding the middle together and the numerous creases unsystematically scattered across the page. He rested on his feet, pressing his lips together. Hastily, he shoved the letter back into his pocket and stared at the headstone.  
>    
>  He suddenly felt a buzzing against his chest. Hoseok slowly rose to his feet, remaining still for a moment before he slid his hand on the inside pocket of his coat. He pulled the box like device out from his pocket and read the caller id. He frowned at the individual who was trying to contact him before sighing.  
>    
>  Hoseok brushed his finger against the answer button and held it up against his ear, hesitantly turning his back to the grave. He started walking, his feet crunching against the brown leaves on the soft ground.  
>    
>  “Hello,” he murmured.  
>    
>  “ _Hoseok!_ ” the caller declared. “ _I’ve been trying to get in contact with you for a few days._ ”  
>    
>  “Sorry, I’ve been busy,” he explained, being rather vague.  
>    
>  “ _Oh, it’s not a problem. I hope I’m not distracting you,_ ” said the voice in the receiver.  
>    
>  “Not at all,” the blond replied, “I was finished for the day.” He stole a quick glance over his shoulder as he came to a halt.  
>    
>  “ _Do you mind if we meet up? That is if you’re not…busy now._ ” Hoseok had to think for a moment. He hadn’t planned anything for the rest of the day, but he hadn’t intended on seeing anyone.  
>    
>  Even though the incident had occurred nearly a year ago, there was still a lingering feeling that told him that he shouldn’t be having fun. That it wasn’t appropriate for him to be happy. At least not at this point.  
>    
>  He knew he wasn’t the only one who thought like that either. Most certainly he wasn’t. He had seen how one of his friends acted. In fact, he would go weeks not hearing anything from them. But what was there to speak about?  
>    
>   “ _Hoseok? Are you still there?_ ”  
>    
>  “Mh? Yes, yes, sorry,” he shook his head and allowed his eyes to shift towards the soft ground. “Where did you want to meet?”  
>    
>  “ _The café at the end of your street? Three?_ ” came the response. He had enough time to get back there, he thought.  
>    
>  “That’s fine. I’ll see you then,” he clarified. Drawing the phone away from his ear, he hung up. The screen fell black and he found himself staring back at his reflection in the sleek screen. He had changed within the past year.  
>    
>  He didn’t linger staring at the device and tucked it back in the inside pocket. He adjusted his jacket, sweeping the warmth against his body. Stealing one final glance behind him at the grave, his eyes slowly flickered upwards at the tree that grew above it the stone headstone.  
>    
>  His gaze settled on a small pink bud growing on the cherry blossom tree. Against the thin brown branches, it was easy to spot the pink ball. Echoing within his head, he could hear the sound of a voice calling out to him. He could envision the events that occurred that last autumn. From the moment he awoke, to the moment he went to sleep that night. Or rather didn’t sleep that night.

 

** SEPTEMBER FIRST **

 

“Hyungwon! Look!” Hoseok called, peering over his shoulder to look at his roommate who was shuffling his feet forward. His hair was still dishevelled from climbing out of bed, despite the fact that it was nearly ten in the morning.  
  
“It’s a tree,” Hyungwon mumbled, “The same tree that has always been there.”  
  
“Not the tree,” Hoseok uttered, rolling his eyes. “The flowers are blooming. In a few weeks this whole street will be filled with them.” Hyungwon gave a ghost of a smile and wrapped his arm around his shoulders.  
  
“Come on, let’s go for breakfast. I need coffee,” he said. The two friends continued walking down the street, the crisp morning air filled with the aroma of fresh pastries and an unknown sweet scent.  
  
The buildings were stationed close together and in multiple floors. Windows were cracked open, permitting the comforting breeze into homes. The pavement was damp with rain from the night before and a hazy mist hovered over the sky.  
  
Hoseok’s eyes landed on an unfamiliar, black car that rolled down the street. Even with the dark windows, he could make out the fair hair behind the wheel. He didn’t think much of the odd occurrence and continued down the street.  
  
Hyungwon was huddled in his long coat, his head buried in the tall collar so that his black hair was the only thing visible on the top of his head. He lowered his head so that it was resting in the crook of Hoseok’s neck. He still appeared as though he was sleepwalking; his hair hung in front of his semi closed eyes.  
  
His roommate turned his head, attempting to steal a peek. Unintentionally Hoseok triggered Hyungwon to slip from his shoulder, and snapping his hands out he took hold of his upper arm causing the both of them to wobble on their feet.  
  
“I swear if I don’t get my coffee in the next five minutes –”  
  
“Yes, I know. You’ll smother me in my sleep,” Hoseok straightened himself out quickly. “You say that, without fail, every morning.”  
  
“I failed to this morning,” Hyungwon commented. “Just let me wake up.” As if to emphasise his point, he raised his hand to his face and rubbed his eyes tiredly.  
  
“What time did you end up sleeping last night?” Hoseok enquired curiously. He glanced sideways at the tall, slender male.  
  
“Let’s see…I remember the number two…”  
  
“So twelve? Two? Two past twelve?”  
  
“Mmm, no. It was half past one,” Hyungwon answered, dropping his hand down by his side. Hoseok furrowed his eyebrows together in confusion.  
  
“How…” he paused, “H-how does that have anything to do with twos?”  
  
“It doesn’t,” Hyungwon responded, a soft laugh escaping his lips. He turned his head, licked his lips and stretched his long arms in front of himself. “It was the answer to my Sudoku puzzle.” Hoseok breathed out an ‘ugh’ sound and lightly pushed Hyungwon. He wobbled to the side of the path before readjusting himself in the centre of the pavement.  
  
They arrived out the front of the café that resided on the end of their street. Inside it was warm and held consisted of warm peach and cream colours. There was the gentle hum that circled the room of neighbours gently speaking over their late breakfast meals.  
  
The two male’s shed their coats from their bodies upon entered the café and retreated to their usual table by the window. A soft light peered through, illuminating the table. They had only just hung their coats over the back of the seats when the waiter was with them.  
  
His hair was an orange-brown and he wore a black apron around his waist. His tan shirt was tucked into the top of his pants and the top of a pen hung loosely from the pocket above the right side of his chest.  
  
“You’re here earlier than usual, I wasn’t expecting to see you for another ten minutes,” he said. It was usual that Hoseok and Hyungwon went out for breakfast every Friday morning as both of them had time off. “The regular I’m guessing.” Both males nodded their heads in confirmation.  
  
“How’s Changkyun going? Is he coming to visit anytime soon?” Hyungwon asked.  
  
“No. But he wants to move out of his parents place, but they’re not completely sold on the idea yet. I’d offer to have him stay with me, but –”  
  
“It would be a party each night,” Hoseok finished as he sat down.  
  
“I was going to say that I don’t have enough room,” the boy shook his head. “That and I think he doesn’t want me burrowing his stuff.”  
  
“That’s just because you never give it back,” Hoseok pointed out.  
  
“Sorry we can’t do anything to help,” Hyungwon interjected, “I’d suggest he moves into our building but someone just rented out the last apartment.”  
  
“No they didn’t,” Hoseok knitted his eyebrows together, glancing up at him, “There’s the place across the hall from us.”  Hyungwon turned his head to him slowly, arching an eyebrow.    
  
“The dean sent out a notice to our floor last Friday. Someone’s moving in there.”  
  
“They are?”  
  
“You still don’t check your emails?” the café employee asked, matching Hyungwon’s expression. “There aren’t secret agents scanning through your emails.”  
  
“You can’t prove that, Kihyun.” The orange haired male sucked in a breath and clucked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. He tilted his head to the side and blew out a soft breath.  
  
“If that’s what you choose to believe,” Kihyun muttered. Hyungwon let out a low groan, as though he had heard this conversation before. In which case he had; a couple hundred times.  
  
“Not now guys,” Hyungwon stated, “Especially since you’re working Kihyun. Aren’t you already in enough trouble with your boss?” The corners of his lips curled up.  
  
“I don’t know where you heard such a thing,” he chuckled softly. “I should get your orders to the kitchen. We should get together sometime next week. I’ll let you know when Changkyun is here.” He turned around, slipping away from their table.  
  
“Before or after the specialised agents catch up with you?” Hoseok called to him.  
  
“Before,” Kihyun answered, a smile still evident on his face. “I want to use you as a scapegoat.”  
  
“I’d like to see you try. You’ll never catch me,” Hoseok laughed, leaning into the back of his chair.  
  
“I don’t need to,” Kihyun peered over his shoulder, “Just need someone to lay the blame of my _terrible_ crimes.” They watched as their friend walked away. Hyungwon sighed as he sat down and drew out one of the packets of sugar from the, shaking the end of it.  
  
Hoseok glanced up at him and rolled his eyes. He placed his hands gently on the table and twisted his body around to face him. He leaned forward, and altered his tone of voice so that their conversation wouldn’t be heard.  
  
“What’s that look for?” Hoseok quizzed.  
  
“What look?” Hyungwon mumbled, shrugging his shoulders, “This is my natural face.”  
  
“You’re wearing your, ‘ _Hoseok…what do you think you’re doing_ ’ face.” Hyungwon dropped his hands down onto the table, releasing the packet of sugar.  
  
“Hoseok, what do you think you’re doing? I get that you guys dated, but –”  
  
“But what? You think I still have feelings for him?” Hoseok interjected, “He’s a friend, we’ve always been close, and that’s not going to change. Just because we’re not dating anymore doesn’t mean we can’t get along. It’d be pretty awkward then since I probably couldn’t step into this place again.”  
  
“Then what’s with the teasing and the inside jokes?”  
  
“You _know_ they’re from before.” He sighed gently. “He was there for when I needed him the most. I’m not going to pretend that it was nothing.” Hyungwon didn’t say anything for a moment but then simply nodded his head.  
  
“Alright,” he murmured, “I believe you. I know you’re not one to do anything stupid…often…I think that was a bad statement.”  
  
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Hoseok objected.  
  
“Nothing,” Hyungwon shook his head while waving his hands in front of his body, “Look, coffee.”

 

* * *

 

Hyungwon twirled his set of keys around his fingers. It was late afternoon and he was just returning back to the apartment. He held a bag of groceries in his other hand and carried the bag by his side. He stepped into the building, his eyes landing on a pile of boxes and furniture cramped in a corner. He frowned then proceeded to walk straight for the stairs since no elevator was situated in the hall.  
  
The building was about five levels up and consisted of well over thirty residents. Below the building was a car park, but many of the people that lived within the building didn’t own a car and instead relied on public transport.  
  
Neither Hyungwon nor Hoseok owned a vehicle. Each week they took turns in who would buy food from the supermarket, and this week it happened to be Hyungwon’s turn. He walked up the steps that would lead him to the second floor when he stopped.  
  
In front of him was a thin male, a little taller than Hoseok. He watched as he struggled to move a wooden box of sorts up the stairs, dragging it against the edge of the steps. As he had never seen him before, he could only assume that the light blond male was the new resident within the building. His suspicion was assisted with the fact that he was lugging a box upstairs.  
  
“Would it help if you took the stuff inside of the box, out?” Hyungwon enquired, gesturing to the lid that was cracked open by a few mere centimetres.  
  
“That means I would have to go back down to get it,” the boy responded. Although he sounded out of breath, his voice still echoed off the walls. There was no complaint about not being able to hear him. “I’m trying…to do this as fast as possible.”  
  
“I’ll help you,” Hyungwon informed. “I’ll just put this stuff away and I’ll be right down.”  
  
“Thank you,” the new boy said. Hyungwon leaped up the stairs, taking two at a time with his long legs. He walked down the hallway and inserted the keys into the lock. He jiggled the key around the stubborn lock until he heard it click. Behind him, he could see the door to the apartment that no doubt now belonged to the male in the stairwell, was wide open.  
  
The layout was similar to the inside of Hyungwon and Hoseok’s apartment. It however was rather bare, aside from three small cardboard boxes pushed up against the wall. He pushed on his door and walked inside his own apartment.  
  
He promptly moved towards the fridge in order to put away the groceries that he had bought. He glanced around the eerily silent area and rubbed the back of his neck. He however continued quickly putting away the recently purchased items and tucked them away in the fridge.  
  
Gently he stepped in the direction of Hoseok’s room, knocking on the door before he pushed it open. Softly he called his name and scanned the room. It was clean aside from the pile of clothes and unmade bed. His roommate however was no were to be seen. He closed the door once more, his gaze adjusting in the direction of the bathroom.  
  
“Hoseok?” he called out again, his voice echoing around the apartment. He didn’t realise that Hoseok wasn’t going be home that evening. “Are you here?” he continued in one final attempt to establish whether or not he was home. But there was no response.  
  
Sighing quietly he exited the apartment and removed his phone from his pocket. Pressing a few buttons, he skimmed across his contacts before dialling his number. He pressed the phone up to his ear, listening to the device ring. He heard the trill sound and a pause before it repeated the sequence until he was forced into the message bank.  
  
“ _Is it recording? **Yes**. How can you tell? **I just can, now leave the message**. Okay…Hi, sorry I could not come to the phone. I will return your call back soon but in the meantime, please leave a message._ ” He heard the sound of Hoseok’s voicemail. He still hadn’t changed it apparently.  
  
“Hoseok,” he spoke into the receiver, “It’s your best friend here. You know the person who you’ve ditched this afternoon. Probably so you don’t burn dinner _again_. Let me know where you are and when you’ll be back tonight.” He ended the call as he reached the boy on the stairwell.  
  
He tucked his phone away and moved to the other edge of the box he was trying to lift up the stairs. His arms shook lightly at the surprisingly heavy weight. It was a wonder how he had managed to get it up this far in the first place.  
  
“I’m guessing you live in the building,” the boy started, “How long have you been living here? Good neighbourhood?”  
  
“Uh…I’ve been here nearly a year. I live with a friend of mine. As far as the neighbourhood itself goes, it’s pretty quiet,” Hyungwon grunted, lifting up the edge of the wooden box. They staggered up the stairs with the box between them. Hyungwon didn’t think he was really the right person to be assisting with this type of manual labour.  
  
“I thought it’d be louder, being close to the city,” he responded.  
  
“We’re on the outskirts, and it’s like a private area tucked away from everything,” Hyungwon stated. He gritted his teeth together as they pushed it up the final steps onto the second floor. He exhaled a breath, glancing down at the two sets of steps that lead to the first floor. He was curious as to how the boy managed to get it up the first half.  
  
“So it’s like it’s own private getaway?” he hummed, “Where’s your friend?” Hyungwon laughed softly and shrugged his shoulders.  
  
“I don’t know. He disappeared.”  
  
“Is that something that normally happens?”  
  
“He’s always off doing strange stuff and occasionally dragging someone along with him,” Hyungwon uttered. “But there isn’t any point talking him out of it.” The two strangers stood at the top of the stairwell, taking a short break in order to catch their breath. The fair haired male rolled his shoulders back, rubbing the left one while letting out a low groan.  
  
His chest was rising and falling with his breathing. He must have carried up numerous items into his apartment without the aid of others. No wonder he appeared tired. He dropped his arms down by his side, both limbs looking like the loose arms of a ragdoll.  
  
Taking hold of the box once more, the two proceeded with their mission of relocating it into the apartment. Although he didn’t assist for long, Hyungwon could already feel the uncomfortable strain on his shoulder sockets as he hauled one of the cardboard boxes up the stairs.  
  
They continued to move the last remaining items from the foyer upstairs and into the newly acquired apartment. Hyungwon glanced at the window that matched the positioning of his own.  
  
However, rather than having a view of another building’s wall, the stranger was given a view of the thin street below. Regardless of the fact that the street consisted of buildings, naked trees and dark pathways, it was still better than looking at the back of another grey building.  
  
Hyungwon didn’t get a chance to speak much as the blond boy spoke rather loud and quickly. He was barely given an opportunity to insert his view. It wasn’t like he minded though. He instead listened to the boy speak. It did however make it had for Hyungwon to find a time in which he would be able to leave.  
  
It was another two hours before he managed to bid his farewell and head over to his apartment. To his discovery, he found Hoseok in the lounge room. His eyes were closed and he was leaning against the seat. On the low coffee table was a wide plate, stacked with two bowls.  
  
He walked over, lifting up the crockery in order to move it  into the kitchen, causing the items to clink together. Hoseok stirred on the couch, his eyes slowly fluttering open.  
  
“Hyungwon…you’re back,” he mumbled. He pushed himself up and slowly ran his fingers through his hair. “Where’ve you been?”  
  
“Where’ve you been?” Hyungwon countered.  
  
“I had a job interview,” he responded. “I told you last week.”  
  
“I don’t remember stuff like that,” Hyungwon stated. He walked towards the kitchen, carrying the crockery to the sink. “Besides I thought it was yesterday.”  
  
“No,” Hoseok called back. From the kitchen, Hyungwon could see the male’s messy brown hair as he stood up. “So where were you?”  
  
“Helping our new neighbour,” Hyungwon informed, twisting the tap so that a steady flow of warm water filled up the sink.  
  
“You must be exhausted,” Hoseok frowned, “I’ll take care of that. You go have a shower and when you come out, I’ll have your food served up.” He held up his hand just as Hyungwon was about to protest. “No, off you go.”  
  
Hyungwon didn’t exactly have any other choice but to follow through with the older male’s order. He wandered out of the kitchen, permitting Hoseok to take his place.  
  
The remainder of the evening didn’t turn out as straightforward though. After Hyungwon had his shower and consumed his food, the two roommates could hear music playing from across the hall. There once silent hallway was filled with the echo of loud music and the occasional banging sound bouncing off the walls.  
  
Hoseok had resumed his position on the couch with Hyungwon leaning against him. The long male’s legs hung over the edge of the couch as it wasn’t big enough to fit his entire body perfectly. Hyungwon’s head was resting in Hoseok’s lap, his damp hair seeping through the cotton pants.  
  
Hyungwon’s eyes weren’t closed but instead were trained against the wall. He lifted an arm and patted it against the couch in search of one of the cushions, before feeling the corners of one of the small rectangular shapes. He placed it against his ear in order to muffle out the sound.  
  
“What’s he doing over there?” Hoseok questioned, his head resting on the back of the couch. He rubbed his hand against his face, letting out a gentle groan.  
  
“I assume he moving stuff around,” Hyungwon answered, his voice half muffled by the cushion in his face.  
  
“It sounds more like it came to life and he’s fighting it,” Hoseok whined. Hyungwon’s shoulders shook with laughter and he nodded his head in agreement.  
  
“It shouldn’t last long, I’m sure he’s tired. I think he moved most of his belongings up by himself,” Hyungwon sighed.  
  
That had been the hopeful wish of course. But the noise did not stop until the early hours of the morning. Birds outside the window were beginning to chirp to one another and both Hoseok and Hyungwon’s eyes were closed but neither had fallen into the peaceful state of sleep.  
  
The sound came to a stop, almost as though someone had flicked a singular switch. Hoseok moaned softly, sinking further into the couch. His body felt too tired to even get up and move to the comforts of his bed. Especially since Hyungwon was resting across his legs; he didn’t want to disturb him.  
  
“I don’t like him,” Hoseok muttered. “I _really_ don’t like him.”


	2. Encounter

** SEPTEMBER NINTH **

 

“So, this is the infamous Changkyun,” Hoseok said, gazing at the young boy who sat across from him, next to Kihyun. “We’ve heard a lot about you. I feel as though I already know you.” The young male’s face seemed to go red with embarrassment.  
  
“Stop it, Hoseok,” Kihyun rolled his eyes and rested his hands gently on the table, “Don’t make me regret letting you guys meet him.”  
  
“I didn’t say anything,” Hyungwon objected. The red-brown haired male tilted his head to the side and made a small hum from the back of his throat.  
  
“You can’t say that you weren’t thinking it,” Kihyun retorted.  
  
“Least I can keep my thoughts to myself, unlike some others,” Hyungwon responded, giving Hoseok a sideways glance. Hoseok raised an eyebrow and leaned into the back of his seat. They were currently all sitting in a booth, with two people on either side. Hoseok and Changkyun had taken the seats closest to the wall.  
  
“I’m older than you, you’re meant to be showing me respect Hyungwon,” Hoseok said.  
  
“Really? I couldn’t tell,” Hyungwon teased. A smile appeared on his lips and slowly he held up his menu in his hands. Hoseok scoffed and looked away from him, readjusting his gaze to the boy across from him.  
  
His dark hair fell in his eyes and his clothing was nearly all black. He was stationed rather close to Kihyun, as though he was using him as a shield. He didn’t say much Hoseok noticed. He had heard Kihyun speak about Changkyun quite a bit that he managed to formulate what the boy was like, however Kihyun had never stated whether or not they were friends or something more.  
  
Hoseok never had the courage to ask Kihyun either, especially not with their history. He hadn’t brought anything of the matter up since they had arrived in the restaurant. If they were together, and Kihyun hadn’t told Changkyun that they used to date, he didn’t want to cause any issues within their new relationship.  
  
The way Kihyun had described Changkyun didn’t seem to match what he was seeing currently. He was expecting someone a little more playful. He assumed Changkyun was shy around people that he didn’t know very well.  
  
“Hey, what do you mean by that?” Hoseok shoved Hyungwon slightly, but the taller male was already shaking with laughter.  
  
“I’m just teasing,” Hyungwon stated, cupping Hoseok’s cheeks in his hands. “Forgive me?”  
  
“No,” Hosoek replied, brushing Hyungwon away. The corner of his lip twitched, indicating that he was struggling to stop himself from smiling. A smirk formed on Hyungwon’s lips as he knew what was happening.  
  
“Hello,” piped up a cheerful voice, “I’ll be serving you this afternoon, would I be able to get you some drinks?” The four seated friends at the table and glanced up at the male who stood at the head of their table, dressed in a waiter’s uniform. An apron was wrapped around their small waist and the buttons of his shirt were fastened to his neck where he wore a bolo tie.  
  
His blond hair was neatly styled from his face and a wide grin was plastered across his face. He gripped a notebook in his hands, as to write down their orders. One by one, the four seated males recited their orders for the waiter to write down.  
  
Hoseok stared at the blond boy, his eyes flickering down to the name tag that was fastened over the right side of his chest. _Minhyuk_. His gaze shifted back to his face and the permanent smile that graced his lips. He was like the sun, Hoseok thought. His fair hair and inviting grin, accompanied by his loud demeanour rivalled that of the bright sun.  
  
When he turned to leave, he found himself watching the boy walk away, in the direction of the kitchen. He was light on his feet and interacted with a few people as he passed them. Even from where Hoseok was sitting, the sound of Minhyuk’s laugh reached his ears.  
  
“I swear, I’ve seen him before,” Hyungwon murmured, his eyebrows knitted together in confusion. He drummed his fingers against the table in thought before shaking his head to himself.  
  
“I’ve seen heap of people come in and out of the café I work at, he doesn’t ring a bell,” Kihyun informed, “Come to think of it, I’ve never seen him in this restaurant either.”  
  
“Normally we have that other guy who serves us,” Changkyun murmured, “The really strong looking one with the nice arms.”  
  
“Maybe he’s new,” Hoseok offered. Hyungwon in took a sudden breath, causing Hosoek to jump in surprise. The tall, slender male slapped his palm down on the table.  
  
“I know where I’ve seen him,” he declared, turning his head to Hoseok, “He’s our new neighbour.”  
  
“The one who was moving all his furniture and belongs around all night, last week? The person who kept us up? The really loud one? I got no sleep.”  
  
“Yeah, _that_ guy,” Hyungwon confirmed. Hoseok crossed his arms over his chest and let out a sigh as he leaned into the back of his cushioned seat. So much for finding him attractive, he thought to himself.  
  
“I don’t like him,” he articulated.  
  
“You were checking him out a moment ago,” Kihyun revealed, “I could see you staring at his ass.” Hoseok’s eyes widened in surprise and his throat instantaneously went dry.  
  
“What? I wasn’t,” he countered, his voice hurried as he spoke.  
  
“Yes, you were,” Kihyun smirked, “Don’t lie. You can’t hide anything from me.”  
  
“Maybe I was checking him out for a _second_ , but he kept me up all night,” Hoseok responded. Changkyun covered his mouth quickly, snorting.  
  
“I’m sorry,” he apologised, “That sounded really dirty.” It was the first time Hoseok had visibly seen Changkyun enjoying himself since they had sat down at the table.  
  
“Dirty?” Hoseok repeated. Kihyun pressed his lips together and tried to restrain a laugh, suddenly understanding what Changkyun found so amusing. “Explain to me what’s so amusing?”  
  
“You said he kept you up all night,” Kihyun tittered. The oldest male felt his face instantly flush, warmth spreading across his cheeks. Within his jacket that hung loosely around his shoulders, the temperature increased.  
  
“Ugh, that’s not what I meant,” he groaned, “Hyungwon tell them what I meant.”  
  
“You’re on your own,” Hyungwon waved him off. Hoseok hung his head back and rested it against the back of the chair and stared at the ceiling.  
  
“Why have you forsaken me? I thought you were on my side,” he tilted his head to the side, looking at Hyung from the corner of his eyes.  
  
“I’m Switzerland,” Hyungwon countered, outwardly disinterested. The thin male shrugged his shoulders before shifting in his seat. “I’m remaining neutral. Mostly because Kihyun would destroy me.” He leaned closer to Hoseok, his breath fanning against his neck. “I haven’t forgotten how much of a savage he can be. I’m not going to underestimate him.”  
  
“Traitor,” Hoseok mumbled under his breath. He pushed Hyungwon’s side, “Let me up, I need to go to the bathroom.” Hyungwon slid out of the booth in order to let Hoseok pass. Once the older male was free, he returned to his position and initiated conversation with the other two males.  
  
Hoseok straightened out his jacket and proceeded to weave his way through the tables, peering over his shoulder. The others seemed to be laughing; probably about their joke on him. He couldn’t help but smile. Despite how irritating they were, he didn’t mind their company.  
  
He suddenly felt his body collide with something and a cool liquid soaked into the front of his shirt. He jumped back in shock, feeling droplets splash onto his face. In front of him was Minhyuk, grasping a tray of two drinks that he was about to serve a couple. Like him, the blond boy was doused in the lemon scented drink.  
  
“I’m terribly sorry,” Minhyuk said, looking at Hoseok. He turned his attention to the couple, who had managed to dodge the spillage, and bowed his head. “I’ll bring you replacements with no extra charge.”  
  
Minhyuk quickly went to clean him, collecting one of the glasses that had fallen to the floor. He placed it back on the tray that he was gripping in hands. He peeked up at Hoseok.  
  
“Again, I am very sorry. If I have ruined your clothing, I will pay for –”  
  
“No, it’s fine. I wasn’t looking where I was going,” he replied. He forced a smile then continued to the bathroom. Exhaling, he lifted the front of his shirt up to inhale the scent of the contents that he now wore. Iced lemon tea.  
  
He pushed his hair back from his face to wash off the tea from his face before they dried out and made his skin sticky. He felt the cool water flush his skin, droplets rolling down his cheeks and off his jaw. He reached for a paper towel out of the dispenser, folded it in half and used it to pat dry his face.  
  
Hoseok heard the sound of the door squeak as it opened. His gaze fell to the paper towel in his hands as he folded it in half again before wiping it across his jaw. He tossed the paper in the bin and turned on the tap to clear the lemon tea from his white shirt.  
  
“Here, let me help,” spoke the familiar voice of the waiter. He turned his head to see Minhyuk in the bathroom, his apron no longer around his waist. The blond boy yanked out a paper towel and stepped toward the sink, placing the rough paper under the tap to soak up some of the water. He glanced up at Hoseok, as though he was asking for permission. Hoseok made no movement to stop him and allowed Minhyuk to take hold of the edge of his shirt to clear off the lemon tea before it stained the shirt.  
  
Hoseok stood silently, pressing his lips together. Standing in the bathroom silently with a male he hadn’t met before produced a somewhat uncomfortable sensation. He watched Minhyuk’s side profile as he wet the towel once more then moved to another patch on Hoseok’s shirt.  
  
“How are you enjoying this part of town?” Hoseok awkwardly asked. Minhyuk paused and glanced up at him. “I live with Hyungwon.”  
  
“I don’t know who that is,” Minhyuk stated. Even in private, Minhyuk didn’t seem to have a volume switch.  
  
“I’m your neighbour,” Hoseok clarified.  
  
“Oh!” Minhyuk exclaimed, “Hyungwon’s the tall, thin guy. He actually mentioned you when he was helping me move in.”  
  
“He did? What did he say?” Hoseok asked.  
  
“Nothing bad if that’s what you’re wondering,” Minhyuk said quickly, “He just told me that you’ve been living together for a while. He also mentioned how you do things that he can’t talk you out of.”  
  
“Did he now?” Hoseok wondered out loud. He rubbed the back of his neck, watching as Minhyuk moved away, having finished with cleaning Hoseok’s shirt to the best of his ability. “So, the day you moved in, you sounded like you were having issues.”  
  
“I didn’t disturb you, did I?” Minhyuk enquired, looking at him. From the expression on Hoseok’s face it was obvious that he had. “I feel like all I am doing is apologising. Sorry. I didn’t really think. I’m used to living in the city.”  
  
“Perhaps we should start over,” Hoseok offered. “I’m Hoseok, your new neighbour. I unfortunately live with my best friend, Hyungwon. Neither of us are very good at cooking, unless you include packeted food. If you ever need a hand moving furniture around, you know where to find me.”  
  
“You do look like you have the muscle for it,” Minhyuk commented, “I’m Minhyuk. I just moved from the city. I am living by myself since my last roommate kicked me out. Not an issue though since I left on good terms with him. If I ever disturb you, or if you want to have dinner let me know.”

 

* * *

 

Hyungwon was leading the group of our friends after they had finished their late lunch. He had his hands shoved deep into his pockets. Behind him Hoseok trailed behind, followed closely by Kihyun who was hanging onto Changkyun.  
  
The youngest male seemed to be struggling to walk forward with Kihyun hanging off him, his arms folded around his own. The smaller male appeared to be doing it on purpose, knowing that it was making it difficult for him.  
  
“It sounds like to me, he was asking you out,” Kihyun called out to Hoseok. The male rubbed the back of his head, messing up his brown hair.  
  
“No, he wasn’t,” he responded. “Besides, I don’t know if he’s gay. He might be straight.”  
  
“What a change of events,” Hyungwon murmured, “You’ve gone from hating him to trying to get into his pants.” He hung his head back, his voice a soft murmur.  
  
“I never said I wanted to get into his pants. Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you,” Hoseok said.  
  
“You don’t have much choice,” Hyungwon peered over his shoulder, “Your friend group is rather limited.”  
  
“Changkyun, you’re my new best friend,” Hoseok declared, turning his attention to the youngest boy. “Kihyun, stop pestering him. You’re annoying.”  
  
“I’m annoying?” Kihyun arched an eyebrow. “ _You’re_ annoying. Remember when you used to stay with me? You always left your stuff on the floor. Any time I asked you to clean up your stuff, you stated you would do it later, and then it never got done. I shouldn’t have to ask you to tidy up after yourself; I’m not your mother.”  
  
“It was organised chaos,” Hoseok shrugged his shoulders.  
  
“Just give it up Kihyun,” Hyungwon stated, “He’s just a messy with me. He leaves his underwear out in the lounge room to dry.”  
  
“That’s not so bad,” Changkyun interjected.  
  
“That’s not even the half of it,” Hyungwon added.  
  
“And what about your bedroom? You threw your alarm across your room this morning,” Hoseok responded.  
  
“I couldn’t find the off button,” Hyungwon raised his hands innocently. Kihyun slowly released Changkyun and stretched his arms behind his back, whispering something quietly to the young boy. From where they were standing, both Hoseok and Hyungwon were too away to be able to hear what the small male said.  
  
Changkyun’s reaction was a soft smile and a nod of the head. He then turned away from Kihyun and sniffed. He let out a soft breath, followed by a rough cough that shook his whole body. Kihyun’s face masked that of concern for the young boy and he gently touched his shoulder. Changkyun lifted a hand and signalling that he was alright before he cleared his throat.  
  
“I’m okay, just something I might be coming down with. I’ll be fine,” he said. “But I should be heading off if I am to make it in time for my bus. My parents are expecting me home before four.” He sighed gently.  
  
“Do you want us to walk you to the bus stop?” Kihyun enquired. Changkyun shook his head and smiled at him.  
  
“No, it’s alright. I can find my own way. I’ll let you guys go,” he said, then looked at Hoseok and Hyungwon. “It was nice to meet you two.”  
  
“Let us know when you’re on this side of town again,” Hoseok informed.  
  
“I will,” the young boy nodded his head in confirmation. “Kihyun’s got my number, I’m sure if you ask him nicely, he’ll give it to you.” A mischievous laugh erupted from Kihyun’s lips.  
  
“Don’t you worry,” Kihyun said, wickedness apparent in his tone of voice.  
  
“I wish you the best of luck,” Changkyun added. The young boy twisted on the heel of his foot and headed in the direction of the nearest bus stop, turning once to wave at them as he left. He huddled into his oversized jacket for warmth, listening to the three male’s yell farewell to him.  
  
Hyungwon stepped forward and wrapped an arm around Kihyun’s shoulder. He let out a gentle sigh and peered down at him. Kihyun arched an eyebrow.  
  
“Don’t worry, I’ll give you his number,” Kihyun grumbled.  
  
“Much obliged, however I was going to ask if the two of you are dating or if you two are just in the stages of fawning over one another,” Hyungwon stated.  
  
“Fawning? I don’t fawn over anyone,” Kihyun responded.  
  
“So, you’re not together. I couldn’t tell,” Hoseok exclaimed. He moved to the other side of Kihyun and rested his elbow on the smaller male’s shoulder.  
  
“Would you two stop using me as an arm rest!” Kihyun cried out. “No, we’re not dating.”  
  
“Why not? He’s got a really nice ass,” Hoseok commented. Kihyun shot him a look and released a heavy sigh.  
  
“Isn’t it weird to have this kind of conversation with you? Don’t you think it’s a bit weird if I’m checking someone out while I’m with you?” the boy asked.  
  
“Is that a confession?” Hoseok quizzed. “Kihyun, if you want to date someone else, I’m fine with that. We may not be together in that way, but I’m going to support whatever decision you want to make. If Changkyun makes you happy, then ask him out already.”  
  
“It’s obvious that he likes you,” Hyungwon added. “He couldn’t keep his eyes off you.” Kihyun could feel his cheeks turning red at the comment. Slowly he brushed their arms off of his shoulders and rubbed his hands together.  
  
“Are you sure?” Kihyun enquired, “I don’t want to make a fool of myself.”  
  
“Go,” Hoseok ordered. “Run to him.”  
  
“You watch too many cheesy films,” Kihyun stated as he began to leave. He shook his head to himself as he left, quickly moving in the direction that Changkyun had disappeared off in. Hyungwon and Hoseok remained standing next to one another, watching as Kihyun left in hopes to catch up with Changkyun.  
  
Hyungwon slid his hands deep into the pockets of his trench coat. His shoulders were pushed back and his hair was gently blowing in the gentle wind that circled the roommates. Hoseok on the other hand was smiling, his hands clasped in front of his body.  
  
“That was very mature of you,” Hyungwon said, “Sorry that I doubted you. Not many people who break up are able to get on as well as the two of you do. Nor can they watch an old flame pursue someone else.”  
  
“We both knew things between the two of us weren’t working. We were better off as friends. Just because things didn’t work out for Kihyun and I, it doesn’t mean I want to see him by himself. Friends can only provide so much, I think,” Hoseok explained. “And if Changkyun ever hurts him, then I’ll have to –”  
  
“I don’t think you’ll have to worry about that, besides, Kihyun knows very well how to take care of himself. But it’s sweet that you still look out for him,” Hyungwon uttered.  
  
“I look out for all my friends,” Hosoek added. “Next, I’m going to set you up with someone.”  
  
“That won’t be necessary,” Hyungwon shook his head.  
  
“No, you’ve been taking care of me. It’s my turn to try and take care of you.”  
  
“I was only taking care you because you sucked at it,” Hyungwon informed. “The start of the year began off a little rocky, but you seem to have found your way. You should continue focusing on yourself.” Hyungwon placed a hand gently on Hosoek’s shoulder. “I’ll always have your back though.”  
  
“Thank you, Hyungwon,” Hoseok smiled softly. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”  
  
“Possibly starve,” Hyungwon teased, “Perhaps even be homeless.”  
  
“Okay,” Hoseok rolled his eyes. “I get it.”  
  
“Maybe even sell your body on the street for money,” Hyungwon continued, his face becoming vacant with thoughts. Hoseok hung his head and groaned, which only earnt him a laugh from Hyungwon. The taller male wrapped his arms around Hoseok and rested his head on his shoulder. Gently Hoseok held onto Hyungwon’s arms, his heart beating rapidly in his chest.  
  
“I hate you.”  
  
“You love me.”

 

> ** PRESENT DAY **  
>    
> 
> 
> Pushing open the door of the café store, Hoseok was hit by the strong scent of coffee. He hardly entered the store. Actually, he barely left his room. Most of the time he could hear his name being called out from the other side of the door, asking him if he was coming out. At least that’s what it had been like for the first couple of months. He preferred to keep himself busy now.  
>    
>  He noticed the dark-haired male sitting at a table in the corner and exhaled gently. Walking forward, he slipped into the seat opposite from him, meeting the gaze of the boy before him. The male offered him a weak smile.  
>    
>  “You don’t look too good,” they said, “How are you holding up?”  
>    
>  “I’m doing better,” he responded. “And you? How have things been going in the city?”  
>    
>  “It’s a change, that’s for certain,” his companion replied. They sat in silence, much different in comparison to how they had been over the phone. The young male across from him dropped his gaze to the table. He reached forward and grasped a packet of sugar and fiddled with it between his fingers. “Hoseok, there’s something that I haven’t told you.”  
>    
>  “And what’s that?” he queried.  
>    
>  “You know how I took him to the hospital?” he started. He gripped the packet tightly between his fingers and in took a breath. “I was trying to get him there as fast as I could. He asked me to go the longer way, telling me it was better to stay off the high way. I listened to him.”  
>    
>  “It was a smart decision. You were in no real state to drive,” Hoseok spoke up. “He was just looking out for your welfare.”  
>    
>  “I know. But if I had remained calm. If I had gotten there faster, maybe then he wouldn’t…” the boy across from him tugged harshly on the sugar packet, tearing it open so that the grains of sugar sprayed across the table.  
>    
>  “It’s not your fault,” Hoseok murmured, his throat feeling as though it was closing on him, “You did what you could.” The boy sniffed and breathed out a shaky breath.  
>    
>  “Sorry, you probably don’t want to be trying to console someone at the moment. You have your own matters to worry about,” they said. “None of us see you much.”  
>    
>  “I know,” Hoseok replied, “Sorry. I’ve been busy.”  
>    
>  “You said that,” the male murmured. “But if you need to talk to anyone, you can ask any one of us. You have five people willing to talk to you. I’m sure even he’d listen to you.” Hoseok nodded his head.  
>    
>  “I know. But I’m so sure that I should be the most affected by it. How’s –”  
>    
>  “He’s working through it slowly, but he’s showing progress,” came the response. “Don’t worry. We’ve got him sorted.”  
>    
>  “He took it a lot worse than any of us did,” Hoseok stated. “You know he refuses to talk to me now. After everything.”  
>    
>  “He’ll get there, I’m sure of it,” his companion said. He brushed his hand across the table, gathering up the grains.  
>    
>  “Are you taking care of yourself? You don’t seem to be doing well,” Hoseok commented.  
>    
>  “You don’t need to look out for me Hoseok,” they answered, “Like you, I guess I’m trying sort things out myself. That’s why I know you need someone to talk to.”  
>    
>  “You’re such a hypocrite,” Hoseok pursed his lips together. “But you do have a point.”  
>    
>  “If you don’t want to talk about it, write it down,” the other figure explained. “It can help. The first thing you need to do is acknowledge what’s happened.”  
>    
>  “Are you going to be taking your own advice?” Hoseok probed.  
>    
>  “Our scenarios are different, and our relationship with him was different too,” they started before pausing. They lifted their eyes to glance at Hoseok, releasing a gentle breath. “But if it’ll settle your nerves, then I will do it too. When you’re ready to talk, any one of us will be ready for you.”  
>    
>  “Thank you,” Hoseok bowed his head forward. “Please, take care of yourself.”  
>    
>  “I’ll try.”


	3. Exploration

> **PRESENT DAY**
> 
>  
> 
> Thoughts rolled across Hoseok’s head as he stared up at the ceiling. The room was quiet, but he could hear the gentle muffle of the television just outside his room. He didn’t get up though and continued to rest his head on his pillow.  
>   
> The sun had set only an hour before just as he was arriving home after meeting up with his friend. He rolled over onto his side and stared at the photograph on his nightstand where the last image of all his friends together rested in a dark brown wooden frame.  
>   
> He stood in the centre with a wide smile on his face, laughing, his eyes glancing down at Minhyuk who was holding onto his left arm. The male had his nose scrunched up as he smiled widely so that his eyes were closed. His light hair was messy, sticking up in multiple directions.  
>   
> On the other side of Minhyuk was Jooheon, who had his left hand resting against his left arm. In the image his dimples were visible. He wore a black cap backwards, his dark hair peering out from underneath it.  
>   
> At the end, next to Jooheon, was Hyunwoo. He had been practically forced to step into the photo. Hoseok chuckled softly the memory of the tall mall awkwardly stepping into the frame after Minhyuk had yelled at him to come closer.  
>   
> Slightly behind Hoseok’s was Hyungwon, giving the camera a thumb up as he pressed his lips together in a smile. He wore a black turtle neck beneath the button up shirt and jacket that he wore. Out of all the individuals present in the image he was wearing the most to cover up. Granted it had been a cold day.  
>   
> Almost directly in front was Kihyun with his right arm around Changkyun and his left hand resting against his wrist. Changkyun was leaning his head against Kihyun’s shoulder with a pleasant smile framing his lips as the older male held him.  
>   
> The smile that had been hovering over Hoseok’s lips fell suddenly and he rolled over so he was lying flat on his back with his hands intertwined together, resting on his stomach. He let out a puff of air, his eyes attempting to find a non-existent line to focus on the ceiling.  
>   
> “I’m done. I’m done trying so hard only for you to never even look in my direction,” echoed a voice in his head. Hoseok closed his eyes, mentally reciting ‘go away in his mind’.  
>   
> “I want to believe you Hoseok, I really do. But then not only would you be lying, I would be too,” came another, the second time it was Kihyun speaking. The memory seemingly harsher. Several phrases of past conversations flooded his thoughts, playing over and over like a broken record.  
>   
> “Don’t you walk away from me, we’re not finished here!” Jooheon had previously yelled at him.  
>   
> “You’re choosing him over us?”  
>   
> “If I wanted your help, I’d ask for it.”  
>   
> “Look, I’m sorry. I went through your room and found this. Explain what the hell this is doing in your room!”  
>   
> “If you do anything to break his heart, I _will_ crush you.”  
>   
>  “Get out!”  
>   
> “This is my goodbye.”  
>   
> “You’re not the only person I fell in love with…”  
>   
> “You don’t have to deal with everything alone,” entered a warmer voice in his mind. It soothed him slightly but even the gently spoken memory provided little stability. Hoseok sat upright suddenly in his bed, resting his hands on his knees. He licked his dry lips, breathing out heavily. He didn’t even realise tears were trickling down his cheeks until several droplets fell onto his shorts.  
>   
> By his bed, his phone buzzed, vibrating against his wooden night stand. He didn’t move from his position for a moment before he outstretched his hand to take hold of the device. Fumbling with it in his hand, he glanced down at the screen to see it was his friend he had only met up with a few hours ago.  
>   
> He declined the call and placed his phone between his legs on the bed. He resumed his position where he was setting his hands against his bare knees and hunching forward. He breathed out softly, letting out a soft sigh when he heard his phone go off again. His gaze fell onto the device, but rather than see the same name as before, this time it was another person.  
>   
> Hoseok furrowed his eyebrows together and grabbed it. He allowed it to ring a while longer before he pressed the answer button and held it up to his ear. Swinging his legs over the edge of the bed and brushing his feet against the floorboards he spoke into the receiver.  
>   
> “Hey,” he mumbled, “What can I do you for?”  
>   
> “ _You didn’t pick up before_ ,” was the response.  
>   
> “What are you talking about?” Hoseok asked, “How do you know?” It was a foolish question on his behalf.  
>   
> “ _Because he’s with me,_ ” answered the voice, “ _I’m going to put him on_.” Hoseok didn’t get a chance to protest as he put onto his friend he saw earlier. A sense of guilt washed over him as he had been caught out. He gritted his teeth together.  
>   
>  “ _I’m too worried to even be mad at you. I get that you’ve got your own problems to deal with but I need your help_ ,” came the voice.  
>   
> “I’m sorry,” Hoseok uttered. “Is something wrong?”  
>   
> “ _I know you’re not on speaking terms but, he’s gone missing,_ ” replied his friend. “ _I went to check on him after we met up, and he wasn’t there. I wouldn’t have been as concerned but…_ ”  
>   
> “But what?” Hoseok leaned forward, slowly rising to his feet.  
>   
> “ _I think he’s taking drugs again,_ ” whispered the voice.  
>   
> “What? I thought he’d worked through his addiction. I thought he was doing better. You said you had him sorted,” Hoseok’s response was hurried.  
>   
> “ _I know, I thought I did._ ” He lunched towards the wardrobe to change into something a little more appropriate. “ _The house was a mess, there was hardly any food in the fridge, it was really dark and it smelt off._ ”  
>   
> He set the phone between his shoulder and ear as he took hold of a pair of jeans to tug over his shorts. He disregarded the fact that he was in his pyjama pants as he got dressed and fumbled around to fasten the pants around his waist.  
>   
> Once he had secured his pants around his waist, he brought the phone back up to his ear and grabbed a pair of socks in order to put his shoes on before he left the house. It was a difficult task to pull on his footwear while listening to his friend speak on the phone.  
>   
> “ _We’re out looking for him at the moment, but we could really use your help._ ”  
>   
> “Don’t worry, I’m on my way,” Hoseok called into the phone, “Where have you looked?”  
>   
> “ _We already went through all the regular places, but we’re running out of ideas,_ ” stated the voice. “ _We already split up with the others. We’re heading to the lake and the others went to the train station._ ”  
>   
> “Others? You’re all looking for him? How long has he been gone? Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” there was silence on the other end of the phone. “Hello? Are you still there?”  
>   
> “ _Y-yeah. I didn’t want to disturb you. You didn’t seem comfortable talking earlier today; I didn’t want to burden you any further._ ”  
>   
> “You’re not a burden,” Hoseok said firmly. “Don’t ever think that. You don’t need to be worried about contacting me for stuff like this. I’m sorry I didn’t pick up at first; that was a fault on my behalf. And don’t worry, we’ll find him.” Hoseok walked out of the bedroom, his feet padding the floor gently. “Make sure to keep your phone on, in case…” Hoseok trailed off. He didn’t want to think the worse, but they needed to make sure that anyone of them would pick up the phone in case someone found him, the hospital called or even the police.  
>   
> “ _I know, I know, and thank you._ ” Hoseok nodded his head once then hung up the phone. He stared at the blank screen, noting the time that was illuminated on the screen. He turned his head looking at the dark-haired figure leaning on the couch.  
>   
> “I’m heading out,” he declared. “I don’t know when I’ll be back.” The male turned his head and looked back at him, their face unreadable.  
>   
> “Is everything alright?” they enquired. For a brief moment, Hoseok contemplated whether or not he was going to say anything; whether he was going to tell him what was going on.  
>   
> “It’s fine, don’t worry about it,” Hoseok lied. “I’ll try and be back as soon as I can. Is there anything I get while I’m out?”  
>   
> “It’s seven o’clock at night…there aren’t _that_ many places that are open,” replied the confused male on the couch. “What’s going on?”  
>   
>  “Nothing,” Hoseok dismissed.  
>   
> “I know you’re lying to me. You normally only do that when you’re either talking about –”  
>   
> “I have to go, please just trust me, okay,” Hoseok interrupted. The male rose to his feet and stepped around the side of the couch. He crossed his arms over his chest and stared directly at him.  
>   
> “I can help,” he said. Hoseok pressed his lips together, avoiding eye contact with him.  
>   
> “It’s not that I don’t want your help, it’s just with you two, things tend to be a little stilted is all,” Hoseok murmured. “I understand why, but –”  
>   
> “I’ll come with you,” spoke the male, “If you need my help, it doesn’t matter who it is. It doesn’t matter what it is. Now, don’t you dare leave without me.”

 

**SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH**

 

Hoseok paced up and down the stairs, holding a book between his fingers. This was his fifth time walking up the flight of stairs to his floor. By this point he was beginning to feel the stretch in his calf muscle.  
  
Upon hearing the sound of footsteps, he stole a quick glance but his shoulders dropped when he saw that it was Hyungwon. He returned his eyes to the book that he was carrying in his hand. Quietly he started from the first sentence inscribed on the page.  
  
The sound of Hyungwon’s footsteps faded as the tall male slinked down the stairwell. It took Hoseok eleven steps to reach the top once more. Turning on the ball of his heel, he pivoted to walk back down the thirty-six steps to the bottom floor again.  
  
This was pathetic, he thought to himself, hanging his head. He bit the inside of his lip and shook his head. Once more wouldn’t hurt. Granted, he had thought the exact same thing previously. Gently he lowered his book and glanced down at the stairs in order to make sure that he didn’t slip. Surprisingly it was something that he hadn’t yet done.  
  
Hoseok neared the bottom when Hyungwon started to move towards the stairs, holding in his hand a thin pile of letters. The younger boy creased a frown on his forehead as he saw his elder. Slowly he placed his hands on his lips.  
  
“What are you doing?” Hyungwon enquired.  
  
“Exercising,” Hoseok replied.  
  
“Really? Are you sure,” Hyungwon tested, arching an eyebrow. He walked up two steps, inching closer to the older boy. Hoseok smiled and closed his book, feigning a look of innocence on his face.  
  
“What else would I be doing?” he retorted.  
  
“I don’t know; you could possibly be waiting for someone?” Hyungwon answered calmly. “I thought you said you didn’t like him.” Hyungwon’s tone was bitter as he spoke, revealing an obvious dislike.  
  
“T-that doesn’t mean that I can’t be nice to him,” Hoseok replied.  
  
“Mmhm, you’re lurking in the stairwell like a creep,” Hyungwon stated plainly. “I’m saying this as your friend; don’t jump blindly into anything, we don’t know him.”  
  
“I’m not going to do anything stupid, I just thought it’d be nice to show him around,” Hoseok commented.  
  
“Why don’t you knock on his door? You know, like a normal person?” Hyungwon quizzed. The taller boy walked up so that he was standing on the same step as Hoseok, his head towering over him.  
  
“Don’t you have work?” Hoseok countered. Hyungwon hummed gently and rolled his eyes.  
  
“I suppose I should go,” Hyungwon uttered, “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”  
  
“Where’s the fun in that,” Hoseok chuckled, continuing on his journey downstairs.  
  
“Are you calling me boring?” Hyungwon asked, directing the question over his shoulder.  
“You’re going to be late,” Hoseok laughed. “If you see Hyunwoo, let him know I said ‘hello’. It’s been a while.”  
  
“He’s busy with assignments, but because I’m a nice friend, I’ll pass on your message if I see him,” the tall male said as he darted out of sight. Hyungwon had been working in the library for nearly two years. He had also shared a class with their friend Hyunwoo before he dropped out. The expenses were too much and he found that he could not intergrade his work life and college life so he decided to save up money before he went back.  
  
In comparison, Hoseok had already finished a bachelor degree in business as per his family’s request but was struggling to find stable employment. He worked a few casual jobs to earn money; one being a security officer and the other as the dishwasher at a bar.  
  
He reached the bottom floor once more and hung his head back. He didn’t know why he was so invested in doing this. Perhaps he was just bored. But if he was bored, he could’ve simply hung out with Hyungwon. Or even call Kihyun. Although, he supposed that’d be a little weird. Or it may not be since he hadn’t heard anything from him since he ran after Changkyun.  
  
The entrance into the building was pushed open and Hoseok saw a hooded figure enter. As soon as they were inside, they pushed down their hood to reveal their messy platinum hair that had been previously concealed.  
  
Minhyuk gripped a bag on his back, the zipper not done all the way up due to the fact that it was overflowing with items. He wore a pair of plain black pants and just beneath the collar of the large hoodie he had thrown on, the rim of his work shirt was visible.  
  
“Hoseok, isn’t it?” Minhyuk directed towards the older male with brown hair. It took him a second to register that he was addressing him.  
  
“Yeah,” he grinned, “Did you just finish off at work?”  
  
“Sort of, there was a slight miscommunication. I was roosted but it turned out I wasn’t actually needed today. They said they’re paying me for the time I was there but aside from that, they said I could have the rest of the day off,” Minhyuk explained, without pausing to take a breath.  
  
“Well, that’s lucky,” Hoseok nodded his head quietly. He held his wrist behind his back, his other hand continuing to hold the book between his fingers.  
  
“What about you? Are you busy today?” Minhyuk queried, as he walked towards the wall of mail collection. He produced a set of keys from within his pocket, the small metal objects clinking against one another as he inserted one into the mailbox holder.  
  
“No, why do you ask?” Hoseok quizzed, his heart jumping in his chest.  
  
“Curiosity,” Minhyuk shrugged his shoulders in return. He opened the mail compartment and drew out two letters, his eyes scanning the front.  
  
“Are you busy today?” the older male stepped forward, swinging from the toe of his shoe to his heel.  
  
“I’m not anymore,” Minhyuk answered, his voice echoing through the foyer. His gaze remained settled on the paper in his hands, flicking from one envelope to the other.  
  
“Have you had a chance to look around?” Hoseok blurted. “If you haven’t, I was wandering if you would like me to give you a tour.”  
  
“That’d be nice,” the younger male grinned, flashing him a smile that radiated like the sun. “I probably should put my things away and change out of my work clothes. You’re welcome to come into my apartment.”  
  
The platinum haired boy started for the stairs, with Hoseok trailing behind. As the browned headed male glanced at the stairs, he couldn’t help but feel a sensation of dread. Stairs once more, he thought to himself. He was quickly beginning to get sick and tired of seeing them.  
  
Climbing up the stairs, they paused outside Minhyuk’s apartment and silently the boy opened the door and permitted Hoseok to enter before him. The slightly shorter boy entered the home, his eyes flickering around the layout of the somewhat untidy apartment. It was a similar design to his and Hyungwon’s apartment, except everything was mirrored.  
  
“Sorry about the mess, I swear it was clean yesterday,” Minhyuk laughed, “Make yourself comfortable, I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Minhyuk skipped forward in the direction that Hoseok took to be his room. Hesitantly he walked forward and sat down on the edge of the couch, placing his book on the low glass table in front of him.  
  
Hoseok couldn’t imagine that the apartment was cleaned a day prior to him being there. There was a clothes horse littered with washing, towels hanging over the back of the couch. Shelves stacked with items unsystematically, papers strewn across the kitchen table and from what he could see in the room adjacent, the dishes hadn’t been done.  
  
He wouldn’t say his apartment was particularly clean either, but everything had a place; curtesy of Hyungwon. The younger boy liked to make sure everything was organised. He wasn’t quite as bad as Kihyun was. Whenever Hoseok stayed over at Kihyun’s house, he had to be careful not to leave a mess otherwise his ex-boyfriend would nag him, threatening to not let him leave until it was done.  
  
Half the time Hoseok would tidy it up, but the other half, Kihyun would wave him off and usher him out so that he could do it. Regrettably, seeing Kihyun frustrated was something that Hoseok had found amusing. Even now, it caused him some bliss in watching.  
  
In the direction that Minhyuk had left in, he could hear the sound of rustling as well as the occasional thud. He was almost concerned with what the boy was doing. He shook his head to himself, mentally making the statement that he didn’t need to check on him.  
  
When Minhyuk returned, he had changed from his work clothes but still brought his backpack. Hoseok only could assume that it contained the belongings that Minhyuk believed he would need for their outing.  
  
“Did you have anywhere in mind?” Minhyuk queried.  
  
“That depends, how well do you know the area? You do have a job in this location,” Hoseok noted.  
  
“I called in a favour with a friend of mine. Hyunwoo helped me get a job before I moved here. I don’t really know my way around,” Minhyuk uttered with a light shrug of his shoulders.  
  
“You know Hyunwoo?” Hoseok exclaimed. Minhyuk studied him for a moment, placing his hands on his hips.  
  
“Yeah, you know him too? Big guy? Doesn’t say much?” Minhyuk’s naturally loud tone seemed to increase with astonishment.  
  
“So it would seem,” Hoseok said, rising to his feet. “In any case, perhaps we can start at the markets, it shouldn’t be too busy today. I can show a few places and depending on the time, maybe we can get some lunch together.”  
  
“Thanks,” Minhyuk smiled. “I appreciate it. Especially after creating such a disturbance last week.”  
  
“Don’t worry about it, we’re still alive. It’s not a big deal,” Hoseok dismissed. He could already hear Hyungwon’s words in his head, reminding him how he said he didn’t like him. Hoseok would perhaps never hear the end of it. Now that he was giving the younger boy a chance, he felt as though he could properly determine that fact.  
  
“If you’re sure,” Minhyuk uttered, arching an eyebrow slightly. “If anything I should be trying to make it up to you. Let me buy lunch.”  
  
“Oh…that won’t be necessary,” Hoseok held up his hand. Minhyuk simply shook his head in response.  
  
“I’m not taking no as an answer, I’m paying,” he said firmly. “Now, shall we go? I’m sure you don’t want to sit here an try to argue with me. Word of warning, you will fail to change my mind.” Hoseok pressed his lips together in thought.  
  
He studied Minhyuk’s face, noting how the young male’s expression was hard, his gaze unwavering, giving a clear indication that he wasn’t to be messed with, despite the fact that he wasn’t strong in appearance. His stance was set, his body locked in place, just like how internal thoughts.  
  
“Let’s go,” Hoseok nodded his head in agreement. “I should give my stuff, and perhaps put my book away.” The brown haired male seized his book, and silently they walked towards the door, crossing over the hallway to Hoseok’s apartment.  
  
The door was still unlocked revealing that Hyungwon still was home. Hoseok bit the inside of his lip as he pushed the door open and let Minhyuk into the room. He grinned softly and disappeared down the hallway. He didn’t quite make it to his room when he heard the sound of a door creaking. He snapped his head around, seeing Hyungwon emerging from the bathroom.  
  
His hair was damp against his forehead, droplets of water running down his skin. A puff of warm steam wafted from behind him. A towel was bound tightly around his waist, covering the lower half of his body.  
  
Hoseok quickly placed his hands on his friend’s shoulders, pushing him back into the bathroom. Hyungwon stumbled back, furrowing his eyebrows together in confusion. He rubbed the side of his head tiredly.  
  
“What are you doing?” Hyungwon mumbled.  
  
“We have a guest in the house, you can’t go walking down the hallway in just a towel,” Hoseok responded quietly. He noted how warm Hyungwon’s skin was beneath his hands, leaving an impression that he had just come out of a hot shower. Hyungwon’s skin had a light shade of pink dusting his body, which also added to that fact.  
  
“Oh?” Hyungwon cocked his head to the side.  
  
“Don't even start,” Hoseok interjected, “We’ll leave soon and then you can come out and put some clothes on.” His gazed flickered down Hyungwon’s body, gazing over his slender frame. He pursed his lips together and promptly turned away and exited the bathroom. He peered down the hallway, hoping that Minhyuk hadn’t heard or seen them. Once satisfied he continued to his room to gather the items he would be taking.  
  
He didn’t need much, just his phone and wallet. He shoved them into a small bag, his heart pounding heavily in his chest. Taking a jacket with himself, he exited the room and walked back in the direction of the lounge room. Hoseok passed Hyungwon on the way, the tall, slender male lurking in the bathroom doorway, drumming his fingers against the doorframe.  
  
“Thank you,” Hoseok whispered as he passed him. The younger boy rolled his eyes in response, completely disregarding respect for his elder.  
  
“I’ll see you later tonight?” Hyungwon murmured.  
  
“Of course, I’ll let you know when I’m on my way back if I don’t get home before you finish work,” Hoseok stated, wearing a kind smile on his face. “Make sure you stay safe.” Hyungwon pressed his lips together and bowed his head forward.  
  
“I will, don’t you worry,” Hyungwon replied. Hoseok slid his hands into the pockets of his black jeans.  
  
“Now put on some pants,” Hoseok winked. The older male left Hyungwon standing in the bathroom and joined Minhyuk who was glancing across the array of photographs on display. “Ready to go now.” Minhyuk turned his head to peer back at him momentarily before staring at the photos again.  
  
“Friends or family?” he enquired.  
  
“Most are family pictures,” Hoseok answered, walking forward, his eyes narrowing in on the one in particular that Minhyuk seemed to be staring at. “That one of me and my friend, Kihyun. He was in the restaurant the other day.”  
  
“I remember,” Minhyuk nodded his head, “He was sitting next to the quiet boy.”  
  
“Changkyun,” Hoseok stated. They moved away from the display shelf and headed in the direction of the door.  
  
“You seemed quite close,” Minhyuk uttered.  
  
“Well, Kihyun and I used to date,” Hoseok began, his eyes quickly flickering to Minhyuk who didn’t seem to make any sign of disgust. If anything, the corner of his lip twitched upwards, “We’re friends now. At first it was a little weird but we later realised that after everything we’ve been through, it would be damaging to the both of us if we cut one another off just because we didn’t work together.”  
  
“Are you and Hyungwon together?” Minhyuk quizzed.  
  
“What? No,” Hoseok shook his head, “He’s my best friend. He’s like a brother to me.”  
  
“I have a friend like that,” Minhyuk wondered out loud, “He tried seeing me up with one of his friends. The guy was a complete bore though.” Guy, Hoseok thought. That explained why Minhyuk had barely reacted to his confession. The male he was currently with was into guys.


	4. Wishes

All Hyungwon could see was blackness. His eyes were closed as he leaned into the back of his chair with his arms folded over his chest. The library was silent, but he supposed that was the whole point. Not many people came in, and even less tended to go up to him and ask him for assistance. Hyungwon tended to do his rounds, reorganising shelves, following up on overdue books and undergoing a general tidy up. However, due to the size of the library, there wasn’t much to do so he could get away with relaxing in his chair for an extended duration of time. On occasion the phone would ring and someone would enquire about a miscellaneous novel or journal articles they were after, or even in some cases some people were making up some excuse as to how their child lost their borrowed book.   
  
He could hear the clicking of keyboards, indicating that he wasn’t alone, but he knew he was being left alone. It was three in the afternoon, which mean he was only required to be there for another three hours. His mind was already thinking about what he would be eating for dinner that night. More specifically who would be cooking. That only made him think how Hoseok had gone out with their new neighbour. A sudden twist lurched in his stomach and he found himself sinking further into his chair. What did he care if his best friend was off having fun with someone else? Hoseok was allowed to go out about his business. He didn’t need Hyungwon’s permission.   
  
His eyes peered open where he heard a soft thump on the counter. He blinked his weary eyes and exhaled deeply. He shifted in his chair, sitting up straight to see that a takeaway cup had been placed in front of him. As his gaze shifted up he noticed the male standing across from him, holding his own cup in his hand. There was a bag slung over their shoulder and their face was vacant of any expression. Hyungwon gently reached forward and grasped the warm takeaway cup.   
  
“Thanks, Hyunwoo,” Hyungwon murmured softly. “How’d you know I was working today?”  
  
“I didn’t,” Hyunwoo spoke quietly, “I just guessed.” Hyungwon smiled and nodded his head. He brought the drink to his lips and took a sip, careful not to burn his tongue in the process. He felt the caffeinated beverage made its way down his throat, to the pit of his stomach. It spread a warmth throughout his body. Typically, whenever Hyunwoo was aware that Hyungwon was working, he would bring him a warm drink. Hyungwon always insisted on paying him back but the older male refused to take money from him.   
  
“Hoseok wanted me to let you know he said ‘hello’. Are you here to study?” Hyungwon asked, keeping his voice at a whisper.   
  
“No, I put two books on hold the other day,” Hyunwoo stated. “I just came to pick them up. I’m working the evening shift at work.”   
  
“Follow me,” Hyungwon instructed, leaving the comforts of his chair to go into the back office where the staff tended to keep reserved books. A lot were placed there and never collected. Hyunwoo quietly followed him through the door into the room where Hyungwon started to search for wherever his colleague had put the books. “We were at your work place the other day. Hoseok and I met Changkyun.”   
  
“I’ve met him,” Hyunwoo uttered, “Kihyun and him come in occasionally while I’m working.”  
  
“Hoseok and my new neighbour served us,” Hyungwon furrowed his eyebrows together as he scanned the shelves. “His name is Min –”  
  
“Lee Minhyuk,” Hyunwoo absentmindedly cut in.   
  
“You’re already acquainted?” Hyungwon turned his head to face his friend.   
  
“Sort of,” Hyunwoo mumbled, shifting from one foot to the other, “I helped Minhyuk get the job. We met a couple of years back and were keeping in contact via message. He told me a few weeks ago that he was moving to this area.” Hyungwon ceased moving for a moment and stared silently at Hyunwoo blanking. It took him a second to recollect his thoughts and soon his attention was focused on the task at hand.   
  
“Oh,” was all Hyungwon managed to say with a small nod of his head. He bent down, looking over the bottom shelf. Perhaps he should sort through this room before he settles himself back down in his seat.   
  
“He can be a bit of a handful at times but he’s a good kid,” Hyunwoo added.  Kid, Hyungwon thought in question. He didn’t voice his exclamation though. If Hyunwoo referred to Minhyuk as a kid, did that mean he saw Hyungwon as a child. He shook his head to himself. “Is he settling in alright? I recall him telling me he was living alone.”  
  
“I think. I don’t see him much. He and Hoseok are hanging out today,” Hyungwon informed, bitterness crawling into his tone. He stretched his long legs up and pivoted on the ball of his foot, turning to face the other bookcase on the other wall. Almost instantly he found the label that had Hyunwoo’s name inscribed on a note, tucked into the elastic band that was bound around the two books. He drew it from the shelf and stepped over towards Hyunwoo, holding out the books.   
  
“Did they ask you?” Hyunwoo enquired.   
  
“Hoseok doesn’t need my permission to go out,” Hyungwon replied briskly.   
  
“That’s not what I meant,” Hyunwoo mumbled, “I meant, did they invite you to go along with them?”  
  
“Oh…well no. But Hoseok knew I was working,” Hyungwon stated. “Besides, it’s good that’s he’s _getting_ back out there.” Hyungwon bit the inside of his cheek, and slowly moved passed Hyunwoo towards the front counter to check the books out digitally.   
  
“Doesn’t that bother you?” Hyunwoo queried as he walked up, placing the books down near the younger male’s hand.   
  
“Why should it?” Hyungwon continued, flicking his fingers across the keyboard. He glanced down at the titles of the books Hyunwoo was intending on taking out.   
  
“I thought you said you were going to talk about how you felt about him,” Hyunwoo began before Hyungwon shot him a sharp look. The slender male didn’t say anything, but his eyes were enough to reflect his thoughts. He didn’t want to talk about it, especially not in the library.   
  
His fingers clicked across the keyboard as he typed in the titles of the books before continuing to manually check them out for Hyunwoo. Once he had completed his task, he pushed the two books forward so that his friend could remove them from the counter. In his quiet voice, Hyunwoo uttered a gentle ‘thanks’. Hyungwon, bit down on the inside of his lower lip and rubbed the back of his neck. The back of his neck felt significantly warmer than his hand, which was like ice against his skin.   
  
“I haven’t spoken to him,” Hyungwon confessed. “I didn’t think it was the right time. Kihyun’s only just become interested in someone. I thought I should let them completely settle, despite the fact that they keep saying everything is fine. You know how Hoseok can get.” He gave a light shrug of his shoulders and turned away from the computer screen, adjusting his eyes so that he was focused on Hyunwoo.   
  
“Don’t you think you’ve left it a little late? He seems to be moving on too,” Hyunwoo murmured. He slowly slid the books closer to himself, slipping off his bag so that he could tuck them away.   
  
“Moving on? With Minhyuk?” Hyungwon quizzed, knitting his eyebrows together in confusion.   
  
“Well yes,” Hyunwoo responded awkwardly, “Minhyuk’s gay. I just assumed that –”  
  
“He’s gay?” the younger librarian interrupted. Hyungwon dropped his hand down on top of the bench and delicately traced the lines of wood. He brushed the tip of his index finger along the smooth wood, avoiding catching any splinters in his skin. “I didn’t realise.” Hyunwoo nodded his head awkwardly, purposely avoiding staring directly at his friend. “And…he’s single? He’s not dating anyone?”  
  
“No, despite his best friend’s effort,” Hyunwoo explained, “Minhyuk’s friendly with everyone; that’s his problem. He doesn’t really know how to date. So, before he left, his friend was trying to hook him up with a couple of people. None of them really worked out though.”   
  
“Well then, it seems I don’t really have anything to worry about then,” Hyungwon concluded.   
  
“I’m not trying to be pessimistic, but it’s not Minhyuk I’m worried about. It’s Hoseok. Just because Minhyuk’s oblivious to the format of dating, doesn’t mean Hoseok is. You know how he’ll see it.”   
  
“You’re saying, Hoseok probably sees their little outing today as a date?” Hyungwon arched an eyebrow.   
  
“Possibly.” Hyungwon shook his head in disbelief. He let out a gentle breath and took his seat once more, settling himself down into it quickly.   
  
“I think you’re reading into it too much. They barely know one another; at this stage they can’t even be classified as friends. They’re acquaintances. Not even that, they’re neighbours.” It sounded as though Hyungwon was trying to convince himself, Hyunwoo thought. But it appeared as though there was no point in trying to argue with the younger boy. It was clear that he had made up his mind. The older male sighed deeply and stepped back from the counter.   
  
“Okay, well I will see you around,” he murmured. “Pass on my well wishes to Hoseok. Minhyuk too if you see him. I don’t think I see him for another week.” The tall, lanky boy quietly nodded his head in response, watching as the elder turned and strolled away, heading towards the exit.   
  
As much as Hyungwon didn’t want to admit it, he knew that Hyunwoo had a point. At the same token though, he didn’t know whether it was wise to act on any feelings that he may have. He didn’t know what they were himself. He had also seen what happened when Hoseok dated Kihyun. They started off as friends, dated and things hadn’t gone well. It hadn’t helped their relationship that Kihyun was the jealous type and tended to put a lot of pressure on Hoseok. Although, it wasn’t just his fault. Hoseok didn’t know how to be serious at times. He would go off and do his own thing, just like what he was doing with Minhyuk.   
  
Hyungwon had gone over in his head all the pro sand the cons of a potential relationship. Currently it was tied up. A lot of the time, the pros and cons list contradicted one another. An example was the fact that they were friends. On one hand, he thought it was stupid idea for best friends to begin dating as it would ruin the dynamic of their relationship. On the other hand, because they knew one another so well, he knew that they would be able to understand each other. He supposed the person he should actually be talking about this with was Kihyun. He could almost imagine how that conversation would go down. Perhaps if Changkyun was there at the same time, it wouldn’t be as weird.   
  
He frowned at the very thought. Changkyun wouldn’t want to be caught in the middle of that. He wasn’t even aware of whether or not Changkyun even knew about Kihyun and Hoseok’s past relationship. Better safe than sorry. He wouldn’t be able to have Changkyun present. That meant he was in for one awkward conversation with Kihyun. He placed his elbow against the desk, setting his chin in the heel of his hand. One of the contradictions of working in a library was that although it was quiet and he could have time to relax, those periods of relaxation normally allowed time for his mind to run wild with thoughts. And let’s just say, his mind was full of them. While the library was deathly silent, his head was a screaming horde of voices.   
  
Breathing out a soft sigh, he took out his phone. Hyungwon stared at the screen silently, pressing his lips together in a hard line. Quickly unlocking the device, he searched his contacts for Kihyun’s name before clicking on it. _I need to talk to you. Just us two. When are you free_? He typed out the message and sent it. Now all he had to do was wait. He let out a soft breath and glanced up. Hiding his phone from sight he dropped his gaze to the floor. Somehow, he felt like his time working in the library would feel longer than usual. 

 

* * *

  
  
Staring at the back of the fair-haired boy’s head, Hoseok watched as he stood by the edge of a fountain. In his fingers, he fiddled with a 500 won coin. Minhyuk turned his head around and glanced back at Hoseok who was clutching a number of bags of miscellaneous items the two of them had purchased at the markets.   
  
“This is stupid,” he whined, pointing towards the bubbling fountain, “How’s throwing a coin in supposed to bring you luck.”   
  
“Come on,” Hoseok responded, “Just do it. You’ll look like an idiot if you don’t.”   
  
“I look like an idiot anyway!” There were a number of people passing by, occasionally looking up towards the two males loudly arguing by the fountain. Minhyuk held up the coin, “Who’s idea was it to throw coins into a fountain in the first place? I mean, who thought of it?” Hoseok shrugged his shoulders lightly as if to say that he didn’t know. “And how do you know if it even works?”   
  
“I don’t,” Hoseok replied, “I don’t even know that if I throw a coin in my wishes are going to come true. Being lucky doesn’t have to mean passing a subject; lucky could mean that you’re lucky that you have a meal the next day, a roof over your head or that you’re healthy. Sometimes I like to think that the wish I made wasn’t for me, but for someone else who needed it.”   
  
“So, you don’t make a wish for yourself?” Minhyuk enquired.   
  
“Sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t,” Hoseok uttered. He slid his hands into the pockets of his coat, his head snuggled into the thick collar covering his neck. Minhyuk glanced down at the coin in his hand briefly before tossing it into the pool of water. He licked his bottom lip and watched as the water rippled. The shiny coin reflected the sunlight from its surface as it sunk to the bottom of the fountain with the collection of numerous other coins.   
  
“A wish for good health? My hope is that you will remain healthy,” Minhyuk stated, peering over his shoulder at the light brown-haired boy. Hoseok felt his face becoming warm as the slender male widely smiled. “Let’s get something to eat. I’m starving,” Minhyuk all but yelled as he skipped forward and took hold of Hoseok’s arm. The muscular male stumbled forward as his hand was practically yanked out from his pocket. His hair brushed across his forward as he stared at Minhyuk’s side profile.   
  
His hair was messy and brushed over the edges of his ears. His jawline was sharp and his eyes small as they narrowed in on scanning the streets before them. His expression revealed that he was focused or that he was plotting something.   
  
“Shouldn’t I be leading?” Hoseok asked, his voice considerably softly.   
  
“I remember we passed a café, I know where I’m going,” Minhyuk declared confidently. As it turned out, Minhyuk didn’t know where he was going. His determined expression slowly faltered as he gazed across the streets, glancing up at the buildings that were stationed close to one another. A mask of confusion crept in on his face, erasing any look of confidence he had. His once hurried pace had slowed to casual wander.   
  
Hoseok, however, kept his mouth shut, not wanting to cause the younger male any embarrassment. He silently allowed Minhyuk to drag him behind him and weave in and out through streets. He knew though, that they had not once travelled down the roads they were currently on. Hoseok didn’t mind though. Occasionally he looked across to the boy to see that he was sticking his tongue out in thought or randomly yelling out in exclamation, making it sound as though he knew where he was going. It was all apart of the adventure, Hoseok thought. It didn’t really matter where the destination was, it was the journey that counted. He couldn’t remember exactly how the saying went, but it was something like that. The sights of the buildings and unfamiliar people passed by in his line of sight. A mixture of several scents wafted in the air.   
  
He bit down on the inside of his lip, his stomach beginning to ache as the hunger pain set in. He wasn’t aware of how long they had been walking around for in search of the café Minhyuk claimed he had seen. He turned his head, taking in their surroundings. If he was completely honest himself, he wasn’t entirely sure where they were either. They were in a part of town that he didn’t normally go to. At least, he hoped, he was better at retracing their steps. He would be able to lead them back to their apartment; whether it by walking or catching a bus. He lifted his arm up and glanced down at the silver watch that was around his wrist. It had been a gift after he had graduated. It rarely took it off as he considered it of high value. He knew, that for a watch it wasn’t as lavish as what some people wore, but to him, it was worth much more than what it was worth. The ticking hands read that it was nearly three. He couldn’t help but let a soft chuckle leave his lips as he realised they had been walking around for nearly an hour and a half.   
  
Minhyuk came to a halt, sticking out his lower lip and huffed softly. His grip on Hoseok loosened and he folded his arms across his chest. He pivoted on the ball of his shoes and turned around so that he was facing his companion. Hoseok quickly noticed how there was a shade of pink splashed across Minhyuk’s cheeks. He couldn’t tell whether it was the wind biting his cheeks or embarrassment; most likely a combination of both. Minhyuk didn’t say anything at first, instead hesitantly opened and closed his mouth as he attempted to formulate words.   
  
“Um…” he stuttered, “There may be a _slight_ chance, that…uh…we’re lost. I may have taken a wrong turn somewhere.” Hoseok couldn’t hide the smile that was spreading across his face.   
  
“I think you took a few wrong turns,” he teased.   
  
“Why didn’t you say anything,” Minhyuk stared at him.   
  
“I was giving you the benefit of the doubt. I just assumed that soon enough you would pull us into a restaurant and say that, that was the place you had seen.” Almost instantaneously, Minhyuk’s burned red.   
  
“That’s smart,” he muttered. He looked down, avoiding direct eye contact with Hoseok. He dug the toe of his shoe into the ground, awkwardly standing on the side of the path. “Do you know of any places nearby?” Hoseok let out a soft breath and looked away from Minhyuk, gesturing with his only free hand.  
  
“That place looks alright,” he informed, pointing to an establishment on the other side of the road. Minhyuk followed his gaze and nodded his head once in agreement. Quickly his mod chanced and he was clutching onto the edge of Hoseok’s clothing, dragging him towards the closest traffic crossing. They didn’t have to wait long before they were walking across the street and towards the small restaurant on the corner of the street.   
  
The rest of the area consisted of a bookstore and a couple of clothing stores. It was evident that they were heading into the fashion district. Stealing a quick peak over his shoulder Hoseok could see the tall buildings of the city rising in the distance. He rarely visited the city, but rather opted to stay in the somewhat quieter bay of the neighbouring areas. He wasn’t in the suburbs. He was still close enough to access what the city had to offer, but far enough to be able to attain some peace and quiet.   
  
A small bell rang above their heads as they entered. Hoseok fumbled with their shopping, moving his hand away from Minhyuk as he readjusted it to the other hand. He could feel the tension leave his hand, now realising how his fingers had tensed up and caused him pain. Glancing down at his fingers he noticed how they had become red in the creases of his fingers. Minhyuk must have been looking over at Hoseok’s as he suddenly spoke up, his voice surprising low.   
  
“I’ll carry them back,” his murmured, his husky voice just inches from his ear. “I didn’t realise, I’m sorry.”   
  
“It’s not your fault,” Hoseok promptly dismissed. “It really isn’t any problem.” He dropped his hand down to his side while he spoke, curling and uncurling his fist to relieve some of the cramping sensation. His kept a grin on his face, masking the dull pain that he felt in his hand, glad that he had moved the shopping from it.   
  
“Hello,” spoke up a female to their side. “Is it just the two of you this afternoon?” the two males turned and looked down at the petite girl who had her hair pinned back from her face in a high ponytail. A few flyaway strands fell down the side of her face, brushing against her jaw as she looked up at them with a false smile plastered on her lips. Even though she appeared bright and chipper, there was something about her that told Hoseok that she had been working there since early morning. Her worn out expression was much different to Kihyun’s. Kihyun although wouldn’t say anything to his boss’s face and continue with whatever he was doing but would want to do everything himself and his forced cheerful demeanour would fade.   
  
Hoseok didn’t know why he was thinking about Kihyun right now. Hurriedly, he compelled himself to erase all thoughts of Kihyun from his mind for the time being. It was good that while his mind was trailing off elsewhere, Minhyuk answered the waitress’s question for them. She led them towards one of the vacant tables and allowed them to settle in before leaving. Hoseok set the bags down by his feet before leaning forward to look at the menu Minhyuk had pulled out from the thin wire rack set in the middle of the table. The paper was untidily laminated, the corners beginning to peel suggesting it’s constant use. Hoseok actually hadn’t been to the restaurant before but gathering from the crowd of people and the cheaper prices on the menu, it was convenient in price rather than trying to be lavish. He was glad, it worked in his favour. Since Minhyuk had stated he was paying for lunch, the older male didn’t want him spending too much; he had been the one that suggested they go out after all.   
  
“What’s a word that means even more than starving?” Minhyuk enquired. Hoseok furrowed his eyebrows together, his elbows resting on the table.   
  
“Famished? Ravenous?”   
  
“Ravenous? Well, I’m ravenous. I’m sure you are too since we did all that unnecessary walking,” Minhyuk said, laying down the menu in front of himself. “So, I think we can order a few things. We deserve it.”   
  
“I thought you wished for my good health,” Hoseok chuckled. Minhyuk propped his elbow on the table and set his chin on his hand and looked up at Hoseok. His fair hair brushed against his lashes as he tilted his head up.   
  
“I did,” he began, the corners of his lips twitching up into a mischievous grin, “and you’re most certainly going to need it after this meal,” Minhyuk winked.


End file.
